WHY DOES GOD ALLOW US TO SUFFER AND HAVE OUR HEARTS BROKEN?

My Testimony:

I have learned that raising a righteous family, doing missionary and temple work, keeping the commandments, working towards an eternal marriage, etc. are all good dreams.  But are not the “highest dream” which is to not only build a relationship with God, but to encounter Him and become like Him.  Sometimes our lower dreams have to be shattered to realize that.

I have also learned that at times we are so focused on feeling good and better right now that we settle for lower dreams and allow addictions to attempt to numb the pain and control of our lives.

I have learned that God does give us more than we can handle by ourselves, but as we turn to Him – we can overcome anything.

I have changed my eternal perspective from just focusing on my end goal of eternal life to also imagining myself as a goddess looking back at this earthly experience as just a moment in time and believe that the trials that seem big right now won’t be so big at that point, but instead stepping stones that have helped shaped me into who I have become.

I have learned that it is okay not to feel “good” all of the time.  Whether we feel good or bad does not determine whether we are on the right or wrong path.  Feeling bad/hurt often draws us closer to God and the right path.

I have learned that the good news of the gospel is not that God will make our lives easier, but the good news is that He will make them better.  He sees the whole picture and we must trust Him that our trials are for our good, drawing us closer to Him.

I used to consider this life as a “trial.”  I believe that we are meant to experience some joy here, but will have to wait until we enter into God’s presence to feel complete joy.  I have learned that shattered dreams are an important part of this earthly journey to be able to deepen our capacity to feel joy.  The highest dream is glorifying God and enjoying Him more than any source of pleasure.

We have a limited perspective, not able to always understand why things happen:

C.S. Lewis: Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on: you knew that those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised. But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of — throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were going to be made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace. He intends to come and live in it Himself.

Through shatter dreams we can deepen our relationship with God and develop traits through adversity.  We are able to forget ourselves and surface a higher desire for God, building new dreams.  We are able to develop humility, accepting the fact that we can’t do it all on our own.  We feel so much pain now so that in the future we can feel so much more joy.  We were not meant to be a part of this world.  God does have a higher plan for us and He will not let us down.

C.S. Lewis: If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world.

C.S. Lewis: What would really satisfy us would be a God who said of anything we happened to like, "What does it matter so long as they are contented?" We want, in fact, not so much a Father in Heaven as a grandfather in heaven - a senile benevolence who, as they say, "liked to see young people enjoying themselves" and whose plan for the universe was simply that it might be truly said at the end of each day, "a good time was had by all."

C.S. Lewis: [Mortals] say of some temporal suffering, "No future bliss can make up for it," not knowing Heaven, once attained, will work backwards and turn even that agony into a glory. And of some sinful pleasure they say "Let me have but this and I'll take the consequences": little dreaming how damnation will spread back and back into their past and contaminate the pleasure of the sin. Both processes begin even before death.

Debra Laaser:  “Shattered dreams open the door to better dreams, dreams that we do not properly value until the dreams that we improperly value are destroyed.  Shattered dreams destroy false expectations, such as the ‘victorious’ Christian life with no real struggle or failure [or the perfect marriage without work].  They help us discover true hope.  We need the help of shattered dreams to put us in touch with what we most long for, to create a felt appetite for better dreams.  And living for the better dreams generates a new, unfamiliar feeling that we eventually recognize as joy.

“Our pain will always have a purpose.  It will not go away, but it will do its work.  It will stir an appetite for a higher purpose – the better hope of knowing God well enough now to love him above everything else . . . and trusting him no matter what happens.”

“I committed myself to the Lord years ago, but last week I felt the deep desire to do it all over again.  I gave him my shattered life, the uncertainty of my marriage, and the fear of what would be next for me.  I just told him I couldn’t control it anymore.  (Shattered Vows: Hope and Healing for Women Who Have Been Sexually Betrayed)